Wednesday, February 15, 2006

The Day Off

After reconsidering, I decided to take a well deserved Mental Health Holiday. My classes are set up with some research and I can take a minute to try to get my stupid Turbo Tax to work so that I can file FAFSA's for my kids in college in the futile hope that they will qualify for a grant or something. This year has been tough. My husband quit his job just about this time last year after 23 years with the same company. Burn-out? Who knows. He worked for awhile for a smaller company out of Louisiana but they got smacked around by Katrina and Rita and it just wasn't making enough money. So he found a new job last month. He's working but I think it's more than he expected. He offices at home, which is nice for him, but as much as I hate to admit it, I miss having some alone time to do what I want, when I want. More and more I find myself called in to "help" or to "run an errand" or to "do a favor"....it isn't that I mind so much as the fact I am flat out exhausted. I come home and do all the things I did before I went back to work AFTER working a full day. And it isn't that I resent it, but I wish for the love of God he could ocassionally figure out how to do things by himself. Every time the computer acts up, he wants me to drop everything and run to help. I guess part of the deal is he hates that everything is on computers and would much rather talk to people face to face, but that concept is gone I am afraid along with its companions of customer service and quality.

But never mind. Today is my self-imposed DAY OFF. I do have to take my Mom to the doctor this morning, but other than that I have a little breathing space so that maybe I can get the bulbs planted in the front yard. Yes I know it's late, but you are supposed to wait until after the second freeze and truly, we didn't get it until last week. Strange weather for a winter in north Texas, but then again, things shift in the universe all the time so why should we be surprised when things change???? My daughter said that in her Physics class they discussed how the polar ice caps change positions every 5000 years or so contributing to weather changes. She noticed that around her birthday when she was little, it would get cold early in December, immediately after. Our winters here have come progressively later since that time with one of the coldest ones occurring in late January. I realize that isn't odd for our more northern neighbors, but its very strange for north Texas. We even had snow flurries in late February-a time when historically it's in the 60's during the day. So a shift in the universe, global warming, whatever, things are changing.

I don't think people do really well with change. I think that accounts for people that stay in bad marriages, bad jobs and bad situations. While they "know" there is something better, it's either too scary or too much work to try to move on. I think this is especially true of men in bad marriages. I work with a man who has four little girls and they are expecting their fourth. Two were hers from a previous marriage. Last week she cleaned out the bank accounts, took their only car, took the kids from school and left town. Now no one knows what goes on behind closed doors, but this guy seems to be a decent sort that has his girls pictures as his screensaver, so I feel sorry for the guy. No money until payday, no car-so he's sponging rides off of other people. He got out of the Army two years ago and finished college and started teaching. I guess with four kids and no money, his wife got tired of scrimping for everything. I have to admit that is a grind since I have been doing it for nearly six years. It takes alot of personal strength. The sad thing is she did the exact same thing last year which is why he left a job that he loved in a private school for a better paying one in a public school. It's sad.
As for my day off, I intend to clean out the fridge, plant those bulbs, clean out the chinchilla's cage and try to get a copy of TurboTax that will actually work. Argh. I know doing taxes doesn't sound like a nifty day off activity, but in terms of making One Less Thing To Do-it rocks.

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